| manic monday |
[May. 12th, 2009|07:04 pm] |
or should i say manic tuesday? it just doesn't sound as good. i've been having feelings of extreme bursts of happiness and at peace with the situation, and at other times i feel agnsty and very uneasy. i really always envisioned myself as single when i think about myself, but somehow am always caught up in long term realationships. it seems like for once, i am becoming very guarded (though some past lovers would say i have always kept my guard up), to the dating world. i've gone out on several 'dates' and met some awesome new people since the last breakup.... which was really not all that long ago. about a month when i think of it.
i'm having somewhat of a pre-midlife crisis. angsty about everything. feeling like i want more, and not having enough. feeling like at 25 i need to figure out who, where, and what makes me happy. sometimes i feel like i know, but it is just a temporary fix.
all i do really know is that i seem to refind myself after every major breakup exploring, relaxing, and living in europe. spain in one week. my mind is already there and my body will follow soon. |
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| closure |
[Jun. 20th, 2008|07:49 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | mi casa! | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
is necessary in every situation. it might be about 8 months late, but we did resolve our issues, even if it was later than i had expected. she is now gone, and that may be for the better. our longer lived friendship was much better than our brief venture into dating. too much confusion, misunderstandings, panic attacks and motion sickness for me to handle in a partner. i am glad that we talked and voiced our problems with each other and the situation, and can finally say i can listen to sade on the radio without having to change it. now i can sit back, drive, and smile. she is an excellent memory. |
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| san diego police department pretty much sucks. |
[Jun. 9th, 2008|06:34 pm] |
it seems like the sdpd likes to send people on a wild goose chase.
i spent all day trying to get the information i need to go to court and hopefully get my car back before the mandatory 30 days. from the traffic office, to the downtown court office, to the dmv and then to the dealership. and all for what feels like nothing. i still don't have my car, a court date, or anything to show for the day i called in sick for work. what i have learned is to never let anyone borrow my car again...
tomorrow i will be back at it again, before work.
on a positive note, i think i got a second job at bed bath and beyond. orientation starts on thursday. i need to save up as much money as possible before the big move in january.
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 8th, 2008|04:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  worried | ] |
such a long time, i had to come back and reserect my livejournal. it was such a good outlet, that i think i need it back.
such a shitty way to start my day off. my unsignificant/significant other borrowed my car while i showered, and managed to get my car impounded. i was unaware that his license was suspended for not paying off a ticket. if i had know, i obviously would not have let him use my car. to make matters worse, when i called the sdpd, the told me there was a hold on it for 30 days.
and the kicker, he is broke as hell, of course. for some reason i keep getting suckered into the 'artistic' type as my mom says. with good heart, but little realistic goals in life. so i am sure, i will be forced to use the money that i have been saving to move to spain on something that i had nothing to do with.
i sure hope the week gets better than this. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 12th, 2005|07:49 pm] |
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and he is trying to peal away at my robot exterier. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 25th, 2005|09:25 pm] |
you know you had a good night when there is cans of sparks light, bottles of smirnoff rasberry, and only about a 1/4 left out of that family size bottle of jack daniels.
round two anyone? |
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| "i want to live in a city with no friends and family, i want to look out the window of my color t.v. |
[Mar. 4th, 2005|11:56 pm] |
we bought our tickets for europe this week. i applied for my passport and even did my taxes. i bought the new 60gb photo ipod and got my computer back from the computer master. (aka daryl)
i am in desperate need of a vacation from this city, my job, and my life.
i want to get my dog a little doggy friend that she can play with. i think she is lonely when i work all day and then come home tired and wanting to go to sleep. she needs someone to play with while i am gone. sign up here.
trips to tj with friends are always fun. i'll take some yummy ass quesadilla's and porkey's anyday... |
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| further down the spiral |
[Jan. 11th, 2005|12:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | pensive | ] |
the internet, life, and my surroundings are starting to bore me.
i feel a change coming soon, possibly even a move.
i've been talking to my room mate, and she feels the same. at least i will have a companion when i decide to flee from this hell.
we buy our tickets for europe this month. i have become estranged to just about everyone in my life. including thomas. we see each other maybe once or twice every two weeks and still the distance between us grows.
i am beginning to rethink a lot of choices i have made.
the only thing that keeps my hopes up is europe and the possibility of never returning.... |
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| the birthday saga |
[Jan. 3rd, 2005|11:53 am] |
| [ | music |
| | kelis.... milkshake! | ] |
"your family is the only one that you can really count on to be there for you, that is something that you have learned at a young age, and something that your aunt domi still hasn't learned... " -my mother.
on the 29th, thomas took me out for my pre-birthday birthday. it was a surprise, and as we drove and walked closer and closer to the destination, i figured it out. it was a dinner cruise along the harbor. it was very nice, the food and everything was really good. they even had a vegetarian option. everyone was dressed up, while i was wearing my jacks. heh, oh well. there was a danse floor in the middle of the dinning area with a dj that serenaded us with classic hits from micheal bolton to sade. then, to get the party going 'milkshake' and 50 cent were popular ones among the young crowd, even though the elders still tried to shake it on the danse floor. it was really nice, and something that i will defiantly remember.
as for the day of my birthday, booze and casinos was the plan, but somehow it turned into only casinos. we decided to have dinner and gamble at barona's. only to find out later that they do not serve alcohol, due to the crazy fucking road you have to take to get there. my birthday was just like every other birthday, full of fucking let downs. i made the most of it, after learning that my 'best friends' weren't going to make it to dinner nor the casino. almost all of my family was there, and so was thomas and aaron. we ate some good ass food, and gambled the night away. it was my first time gambling, so i stuck to the slot machines. by the end of the night, i came up 20 bucks. my mother and grandmother were hell bent on buying me my first legal drink, so on the way home we stopped by dave and busters.
elise gave me free magic mountain tickets that had to be used by the 31st, and luckily, i was off the 31st. i knew bill was off, so i picked him up and we spent our new years eve there. we stopped at wheel of life, and he got to meet mr. vegan himself. (the owner) they have the best vegan food that i have ever had. it rained the entire drive up there, we were thinking that we were going to have to buy ponchos to make it work, but it cleared up right when we got there. because of the rain, there was only about 200 people total throughout the park. we never had to wait for any ride, we just ran from one ride to the other. we did everything in about 5 hours, but stayed until the park closed to keep riding. we got back to my house around 11:45pm, colin, ashley, aaron, elise, bill, and drank and waiting for the ball to drop. at midnight, there were so many shotguns going off in my neighborhood, it was unreal. i went to bed kind of early because i had to work the next day.
last night, elise and i ate at spaghetti factory because it was their last night open. yes, the good ol factory is closing down. we ate some good ass food, and on our way back to the car, we saw this girl with one of their purple victorian couches outside. she told us to take the couch, and she would wait for us while we went back to get our car. the whole time this event was happening, there was a news broadcaster filming a piece on the factory, and we were in the backround trying to steal a couch. i pulled my car up, we tried so hard to fit it in, but to no avail. i took elise's keys and was on my way to get her car. about five minutes later, i got a phone call from her saying that the manager took the couch back. at least we tried! no purple couch for us.
today it's olive garden and a series of unfortunate events. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 28th, 2004|09:40 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | prince, purple rain the movie!! | ] |
i think john secada was reinvented as ricki martin. they sound strangely similar.
it's raining like crazy. i ran from work to my car and it felt like someone squirted water on me with a hose.
christmas was fun. i got some cool shit, and my family came over to my house and watched elf and ate kettle corn. yum. i got elise and i these amazing heaters from my work that work like a mother fucker. now our rooms are warm and toasty. i got some rather shitty news yesterday, when i went to visit my mother. she isn't giving me as much money as she once said she was for my europe trip. that means i have to save even more money than i have been. i guess it will be worth it when i go, to have extra cash to spend there, rather than spending it on obscure items from wallmart or $20 face wash.
i think we are planning a rande vou at barona casino on the 30th, and possibly getting a hotel to accommodate all of you fucks that will be crashing there. i have absolutely no plans for new years, so if anything exciting is going on that i should know about, you know who to call. and it ain't ghostbusters beyotch. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 22nd, 2004|10:18 pm] |
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tony called me tonight, said that tyson's having another party tonight. that would make three nights in a row. party animals. i have other things on my mind right now... maybe it would do me good. to get my mind off of things. too bad i have to wake up at 6am. maybe i will sit here and watch tv until my head explodes. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 18th, 2004|07:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hopeful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | danzing | ] |
parties, parties, parties...
work, work, work...
yea. that's my life in a fucking nut shell. but the best party of all happened to be the infamous pirate party, that turned into a massive sleepover. french toast in the morning, along with vomit and a broken table. i can say my life has been very eventful.
i am completely broke because of christmas. this is the first year where i actually bought everyone in my family gifts. every other year i would buy some things, and make my mom buy the rest. i spent a total of around $600. WAMU is definitely going to give me a taking-to.
my birthday is coming up, i am going to be 21. and it couldn't have come at a better time. booze and casino's here i come! i don't have any plans as of yet, so if you have an idea of something fun and exciting, speak up.
my room mate and i are on this kick, that we are going to make it fucking big in MTV land and never have to work again. since we are two, reasonably attractive girls, i am sure we can break through... as long as our video involves sex, booze and rock & roll we will be on the right track.
work has been crazy, i switched departments yet again. what a fucking surprise, i know. this time, it seems to be in my favor. i got a dollar raise and now work designing kitchens. i still get my month of june off to go to europe. i am buying my tickets and renewing my passport in january.
it's cold in my house. i either need another comforter (that would make five total on my bed) or someone to share my bed with. |
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| fourteen year old mexicans and falcore from the never ending story |
[Nov. 24th, 2004|11:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | relaxed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the killers | ] |
i found a dog in the middle of the street, a couple blocks away from my house. it was around these two mexican boys, and would not move out of the street. i put my hazards on, and convinced the two boys to help me get the dog into my car. they said it had been following them for about an hour, and by the looks and actions of the dog, it had been abandoned. he is white and looks like he might be a corgie. he looks like falcore, the flying dog in the never ending story, so that is his new name. except i call him valcore, with a v instead of with a f... don't ask me why.
after helping me get the dog in the car, the fourteen year old mexican boys asked me for a ride. i asked them what they were doing, their age, and what they do for fun. they said they were just coming from a party and needed a ride to spring valley. i don't know how/why i get myself into these situations, but what the hell. i decided to drive them to spring valley. ashley, elise, joel, and i spent the rest of the night watching saved and trying to figure out what the fuck we were going to do with this dog.
on tuesday night, it was thanksgiving dinner at joel's house. some girl made a bunch of home cooked food, and the only thing i could eat was mashed potatoes. we sat around drinking spiced pepsi and making dirty jokes while joel's father was lurking in the next room. i really don't know what to do with valcore, because i know we can't keep him. we already have a dog, and she is not fixed. neither is valcore. so they are going to fuck and make all kinds of crazy babies. so if anyone wants a dog, or knows someone who wants one, contact me and i will make arrangements for you to see him. he is really nice and sweet, and really needs a good home.
thomas painted a picture of me today. it kinda looks like me but with like spiders all over. i think i am going to get a crazy frame and hang it up somewhere. we went out to dinner tonight with his father and elise. spegetti facory = yum. we don't hang out as much as we used to, i am just trying to get my head on straight and figure out what is going on. i know it will happen soon, i just have to give it time.
in other news, i am having a pirate party at my house on december the 3rd. shipley and i are hosting, and everyone has to come dressed up like a pirate. we are going all out and decorating and everything. if you need my address and directions, email me at ignore_the_machine@sbcglobal.net or call me. |
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| talking to some girl in the middle of the danse floor @ le tigre |
[Nov. 17th, 2004|08:12 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my dog eating her breakfast | ] |
karina and i make our way to the danse floor while lesbians on ecstasy were playing, and started dansing with anyone we found that we found shaking their ass, and that was hot. we had the most amazing conversation with this random girl...
girl- "are you two lesbians?"
us- "yea... are you?"
girl- "no, but i LOVE lesbians," and starts to danse with us.
us- laughing our balls off.
girl- "are you two into threesomes?"
us- "uhhh. sure."
girl- "good... i'm on ecstasy, and this is my friend, and we should all meet up. oh my god, it is soooo hot. WATER!"
and as quick as she came, she was gone, to try and find some water. we dansed away, a little scared and confused by what just happened. after that we went to the side of soma, and that's where we remained the rest of the show.
the show was good, but they played everything from their new album, which is not very good. there are like 3 good songs and the others are just blah. but they played well, and we got to see a lot of people that we knew. karina vagina is an awesome danse partner.
just rememeber kids:
there is no sitting in your car waiting until the show starts! a security guard in a yellow jacket will assure you of that. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 11th, 2004|09:41 pm] |
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remember when joel, his brother and his brother's friend were on the way to my house? of course i do, because that is what is going down right now. i haven't seen joel since high school, so this should be an experience to say the least. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 4th, 2004|01:26 pm] |
i have a gaint bowl of homemade miso soup in the fridge.
come over and eat some. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 4th, 2004|10:35 am] |
i was missing from the online world for about a week or so due to computer problems. it's always something. maybe i am just not meant to be online? hah. i called a computer repair place and they fixed the problem, cleaned my files up, and installed new programs to fight viruses and pop up problems.
as we all know, bush was re-elected. my mom is going to have an emotional breakdown, i called her this morning when it was announced, and she was crying uncontrollably. my whole family voted for kerry, my mom stated the other day that this country will go to hell in a hand basket if bush gets re-elected. we probably will, but there is pretty much nothing we can do to stop it now. i did my part, so did my friends and family. but there were so many others who didn't do a damn thing, and now it's over.
i had a halloween party. though there wasn't very many people there, everyone that i did invite was there. that was just how i wanted it... well, everyone except ashley. ashley is my cousin who recently moved from palm springs. we had a very close upbringing and now that she is here, i see her almost everyday. she ended up going to see her boyfriend that weekend... it's ok. we had fun without her anyways. the guest list went a little something like this: colin, shipley, karina, paul, karen, jaime, raquel, and of course my room mate and i. we stayed up until around 4 am, singing theme songs from fresh prince and screaming the entire tenacious d album and the top of our lungs. good times. (don't worry karen, i will burn you a copy and next time you can scream along.)
thomas and i decided to take my 13 year old brother out on halloween. we all dressed up, or kind of did, went to peter piper pizza. we ate and played air hockey and sky ball until we ran out of money. we went back to the eastlake area to trick-or-treat. i think americans are getting lazier over the years. i remember every house having some sort of decorations, or at the least, giving out candy. this year, maybe about 15 out of 40 houses were passing out candy. fucking lame.
and to sum up the rest of my week-
work.
tonight should be fun though. jaime is coming over after i get off, and we all might make our way to drive in to see saw. everyone is invited. |
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| those jeans are a size H for heroin |
[Oct. 24th, 2004|10:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | elise watching south park | ] |
oh what a fun filled weekend i had.
on friday, shipley and i went to see counterfit. we decided that we were retiring counterfit shows, since we were the oldest 'kids' in the crowd. i swear everyone was at tops 14. the set was shitty, his voice was even shittier, and he is now on heroin. elise and thomas warned me about this, but i did not believe it until i saw him with my own eyes. his hair was very long and matted, his shirts were so big on him because he lost so much weight, and his jeans must now be a size H for heroin. that was by far the most depressing show i have ever been to, and we vowed never to go to another counterfit show again. i don't think i will even miss it, seeing as though we haven't been to one in what seems like a year now...
saturday i worked all day, or so it seemed. i came home and elise and i fucked around the house like crackheads until 4am. but we did manage to clean the house and create a new toilet seat cover. it now has the most amazing picture of gale harold that we have ever seen. there will be pictures, don't you worry.
i did not leave the house at all today. it was my day off and i was on a fucking mission to get our house together. my mom came over and together we put in new bathroom tiles, hung up a new towel rack set, and hung up starry night in the kitchen. slowly but surely our house is coming together.
now if we can only get our landlord to fix our fence and hang the microwave we will be in great shape. i have friday, saturday, and sunday off. you better believe that we will be having a halloween party.
you are invited. call or email me if you need directions. |
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| europe here i fucking come. |
[Oct. 22nd, 2004|03:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | satisfied | ] |
| [ | music |
| | soft cell | ] |
so the store manager came to find me today.
he took me back to his office and asked if i had made a decision on switching departments yet. i told him that i would do it only if i could have the entire month of june off. i also bitched about how i would be making less money in commission, and how i hated to close...
we made this deal:
-i get june off.
-i get a $1 raise. (seeing as though i have only been working here for 5 months, that is fucking amazing)
-the closing shifts will be evenly distributed, leaving me with mostly mids.
i could sell someone the shirt off their own back if there was something in it for me. i am really good at selling my self as a responsible person who cares about the company and moving up... obviously it worked.
i fucking rule. the end. |
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